So I was really excited about this whole Deep Throat story, even though I was born several years after Watergate and all. Darn Political Science, creeping into my life. I still can't figure out why the reporters chose to name the informant after the porn movie, and my fear of accidentally stumbling on porn sites has limited my internet searches. Let me know if anyone knows for sure.

www.jumptheshark.com is so addictive. Check out the Elmo analysis for Sesame Street.

ok, so i just woke up, so I'll use that as an excuse for what I might say in this blog that I might not say on another day. I just realized that it is about a year since I graduated, and yesterday I realized that I'm the same age (23) that my younger older brother was when I met him 5 years ago in the summer before I started college. What have I accomplished since then.

On one hand, not much. I have a degree from Harvard, as I usually forget, yet haven't had a job since last summer (though I am going back to that place, a summer camp, this summer and got a promotion). My brother was already an entrepreneur (or however you actually spell it) doing his own business stuff by now, and I'm living in my mom's living room. I'm low on cash, have no girlfriend, no drivers license,....

And yet, as I wrote that paragraph, I realize that I'm actually kinda happy. I have a lot of prospects (I'm going back to the place I worked last summer, I'm going to start a PhD program in the fall, girls find me irresistible, Boston has public transportation...). Even if one of those might not be true, life is actually kinda good I guess. Plus I have great family and friends, am healthy (according to all these checkups I've had to do for camp/school/etc), God loves me (He's been good to me).

Yay! Things are good.

So today Common's new album "BE" comes out. For those of you who don't know, Common is an MC from Chicago who's long been hailed as a great if underappreciated artist. Fans had been a little wary of his moves into left field of late (dating Erykah Badu, increasingly unusual style of dress and music), but everyone has been hailing this new album as a classic or near classic. I listened to it a few times on an online preview, and while I initially thought it was good not great, I've liked it more each time I've listened and now think it lives up to the hype.

The album is pretty short-about 43 minutes, 11 songs. Kanye West, a fellow Chi-Town native, produced 9 of those tracks and appears at a few points, mostly on choruses, on the album. Since the album is named BE (which apparently also stands for Basement Elevation, though I'm not sure exactly what that means), I did notice the word "be" and the concept of being throughout the album. I also noticed various songs getting stuck in my head at different points (I won't bias you by telling you which). A few things might be a little problematic for a "conscious" rapper like Common (like the sex fantasies on one of the songs and accompanying girl-filled video), but Common's stuff is deeper and more thought out than a quick glance or listen might reveal (for instance, I wondered about him writing a verse on one song from the perspective of a prostitute, but found out that it is actually based on a conversation he had with a real person). Check it out on www.bet.com/music (you might have to create an account in order to listen).

In case you were wondering, my doctor's visit went fine, and assuming my TB test comes back negative, I seem to be in good health. My bad cholesterol is low and my good cholesterol is appropriately high, and my neutral cholesterol-does that exist? I'm also apparently 5' 6" now-perhaps I should stand up straight more often.

My doctor was a Harvard undergrad who lived in Winthrop house. I would've asked more, but i figured she had other patients to see, and the hospital gown thing did make it a little awkward for striking up conversation.

So I knew I watched Desperate Housewives and I knew I got my mom to watch it too, but I didn't know my dad watches it as well. Not quite the answer to the I-don't-know-much-about-my-dad post.

On unrelated news, I get to go to the doctor at 8:30! tomorrow. Don't worry, just a checkup, unless they find something weird, like they did when I went to the dentist a couple weeks ago (hmm, perhaps I should check that out. It actually is oddly fun when a doctor, or dentist in this case, comes in, looks at your x-ray, and starts talking to the nurse/assistant about how he doesn't know what something is in the picture :)) Will my doctor visit be as fun? time will tell, my friends.

So I've been thinking a bit about Mexican-US and Latino-American relations a little, mainly because of some stuff in the news lately. First there was the issue about banning illegal immigrants from getting driver's licenses. I do admit that this particular issue does strike me as kind of weird, considering that illegal immigrants are here, well, illegally, and so it's odd to think about government issuing licenses to non-citizens. Not that it's a bad idea necessarily, but I do see the point of those who oppose these licenses.

Then there was the comment made by Mexican President Vicente Fox that (as it's been translated): "There's no doubt that Mexican men and women -- full of dignity, willpower and a capacity for work -- are doing the work that not even blacks want to do in the United States." Needless to say that didn't go over too well with a lot of folks, and President Fox has backed away and apologized, or almost apologized at least, for this statement.

Yet I did find a grain of truth, kinda, in the statement. What I mean is that, in a lot of ways, Latinos, especially illegal immigrants, have taken up the role formerly played by blacks in the US. In popular wisdom and culture they're expected to do a lot of the menial work, and stereotypes and racism toward them are allowed to be overtly expressed in ways that are no longer socially acceptable (or at least no longer as socially acceptable) to do against blacks.

Even government gets into the act. See, for instance, the so-called Congressional Immigration Reform Caucus: http://tancredo.house.gov/irc/welcome.htm
I was surprised that elected officials in our government could be so, let's say "unthoughtful" in their politics and opinions. Some of their arguments just seem to me to be kinda garbage-see for instance immigration's impact on "Culture" (their entire "argument" is that the amount of immigrants has increased. I guess this is supposed to imply something, but they don't tell you what).

On the other hand you have the President's Guest Worker proposal that he laid out a while back. I haven't evaluated all the aspects of this idea, but the part that disturbs me is the idea of immigrants doing jobs that Americans "refuse to do." While this may be a reality, I am very disturbed that such a social stratisfication would be accepted and endorsed by our leaders. I mean, is this really so different from President Fox's comment? So, basically, some jobs are beneath us but are ok for others (formerly blacks, now Latino immigrants) to do? Ah, America. sigh

I don't know a whole lot about my father's side of the family. I had to fill out some info about him for a medical form i filled out at the doctor's office yesterday. I don't even know how old he is-I wrote my best guest.

I do know how old my half brothers are (28, 38) but still have a lot of blanks with them too. We kinda got off to a late start. I think i met my father around 7th or 8th grade, and have for the most part kept sporadic contact. My brothers I think I met at 18 (my younger older brother, during the summer before college started) and 19 (my older older brother, winter break that year). They're both cool but our relationship is kinda strange. We have the whole brother thing going pretty well (I think they, especially my younger older brother, like having a baby brother) but without any of the history. As far as I know, they don't have any sisters (the previous post was strictly hypothetical-really) or other siblings. And I know bits and pieces about their histories from casual conversation, but haven't really sat them down and gotten all the basics from them. I'm not sure if that's really a big deal or not, but it's a little unusual I guess. I would like to know some more about them in order to relate better, and I feel like we haven't had enough time for them to get to know me really-I haven't quite gotten to the "completely being myself" level with them.

Most of what I know about my dad is from my mom I think, so my info might be a bit one sided (they didn't part on the best of terms i've gathered). I haven't really asked for his side of things (I'm not entirely sure I want to, as I don't necessarily want him to confirm everything my mom has said, and I'm not sure I'd buy it if he contradicted what she's told me instead). Not that I have any animosity against him (do I?), or that my mom wants me to (she's good about not trying to influence my opinion of him, and she likes my brothers) and he has been trying to do the father thing in recent years, within the confines of me already being an adult (did I just say that?-*shudder*) and all. Maybe his version of the whole estrangement thing does make sense. Maybe it doesn't matter now. Is this all weird or not?-I dont have another family to compare it to.

Ok, so suppose you're a guy who has a half brother, and your half brother has a half sister who isn't related to you (or pretend you're a girl and just switch all the "brother"s and "sister"s above). Is it ok to date your half sibling's half sibling? I mean, technically you aren't related, but still....

Watching too many soap operas.

I just re realized that the United Nations building is in New York. I mean, I knew it was, but I guess I didn't really think about it much-the UN seems like this faraway entity with which we don't get along very well and all, but it's (physically, at least) IN the United States. Hmmm....

I also realized that I must actually like this politics stuff, as I was listening to the debate on C-Span (yeah, C-Span) about the John Bolton nomination for UN ambassador, and I enjoyed it. I also like the Sunday morning political talk programs and Charlie Rose on PBS. I fear I'm becoming an adult, or at least a politically aware kid.

Holding someone is nice isnt it? I think I understand why people like teddy bears or big pillows-it's just a good feeling.

I was thinking this morning though, about sleeping in the same bed with someone (not from a perspective of having sex with them or anything like that-you know I'm saving myself until I'm married to that special girl [awwwwwwww]). Anyway, just like having someone to hold seems like it would be nice, but it also seems like it might be kind of impractical during the whole sleeping process. I like to have space to roll around and stuff when I sleep and have weird dreams and all, and it seems like having another person there would kind of get in the way, and my shifting would probably be annoying to them. How do people do that-do they just get used to it after a while or what? Not that I have to worry about that anytime in the immediate future, but I am curious at least.

I love ya mom (who isn't reading this anyway, but oh well :))
Thanks to everyone who commented or will comment on any of my posts-much appreciated.

I was listening to Songs in A Minor by Alicia Keys yesterday. It's a really good album. I used to like her second album (The Diary of Alicia Keys) better, but I think that, on average, I'm leaning toward Songs now. Both are really good though-I feel that she's light years ahead of most of the R&B/Soul acts out nowadays. Just listen to songs like Troubles or Mr. Man on the first CD. Or my favorite, Diary, off of the latest disc. She goes beyond the trite "oh I love you, I'll be down for you and we can have lots of sex" sentiments of many R&B love songs. I really like the deepness and creativity of the concept of this song, that this guy she is with can open up to her as if she were his diary. Its such a novel way of expressing a close relationship, and yet it makes perfect sense. And the song itself just sounds so good-its slow and deep and layered, and the back and forth "I won't tell" between her and Tony Toni Tone' is a great emotional crescendo (I don't know if it also qualifies as a musical crescendo-you musicians might know better) to the sentiment of the song.
I should probably disclaim that I have a bit of a thing for her too (not a real crush or anything, but she is easy on the eyes, I say with vast understatement) , and so I might be a bit biased. I've often wondered if I would have liked her music as much if I had heard it before knowing who it came for. But I think I can honestly say that the music lives up to the hype. And dude, she's my age-why couldn't I have grown up in New York :)

Hope the religious talk doesn't scare anyone away.

So I was trying to talk to God yesterday. It was National Prayer Day, and so I figured I'd take some time out to pray a little more than usual. I do fear that I might be neglecting my relationship with God a little bit.

There's a part of the Bible where someone asks Jesus what the greatest commandment is, and he responds with two principles-love God and love your neighbor. I've been trying to do the latter with my concern for people suffering from poverty and violence (esp. in Africa), but I fear that I might be doing so at the expense of the former. I don't think that these have to be exclusive, but I think that maybe in this case I might (unconsciously) be approaching the situation like doing more to care for others somehow fills up my quota of holiness or something and therefore don't feel I have to spend as much time in prayer, Bible reading, worship, etc.

Thinking about this however, I know tht I shouldn't approach it this way because, first, not communing with God will probably hurt my approaches to loving others (by missing out on where God is leading me, etc) and because, even if I could be just as effective in how I act toward others, I'm still missing the bigger picture of my relationship with God, which is the point of this whole Christianity.

If you are a praying person, drop a little one for me eh :)

"To shave or not to shave, that is the question. whether 'tis nobler..."-ok, that might be a bit snoody (or snoody might not be a word), and I haven't even read that play.

So, should I go beard or no beard? I used to have one, as my college friends know. I started growing a beard around junior or senior year of high school I think. I was really happy about that bc otherwise I think I still look like a middle school kid. But around senior year of college I started shaving it off bc I thought it made me look old, and, I don't know, I guess now that I'm getting up there (23! already) I want to recapture my youth, and the beard was getting too full and making me look old, which wasn't a cool thing like it was in high school.

Plus, do women really like guys with beards? I mean, it seems like it would be uncomfortable. I mean, I know that sometimes when I haven't shaved in a while its uncomfortable for me, hard to sleep on even. On the other hand, a neat trim beard does make you look kind of cool. Right now I'm in a bit of a compromise-I try to stay clean shaven but I also get lazy and let it grow out sometimes before I get around to shaving again. I should probably choose a look and keep with it though.

Yes, you would think that I'd have something more important to think about, wouldn't you. But if anyone has suggestions about the bearded look let me know.

(Bad) Pick up lines (don't expect them to work, but they might be amusing to use)

I've just arrived in fineville, population: you. (adapted from a Simpson's line)

I would hold you, but I didn't bring my oven mitts

I was gonna buy you a present, but how about I give you my last name?

I hope there's a little room in your heart for me-I'll carry my own bags.

I'd like to hold your hand, just to make sure you're real.

I don't want a date; I want your whole calendar.

I'll trade you-your number for my heart.

Shouldn't you come with a warning label? (i'm not even sure what that one means)

A walk like that should have theme music

My favorite:
Is it sexy in here or is it just you? (from a 14yr old kid at a summer camp)

Not that I want to go out and get wasted (do kids say "wasted" nowadays?), but I am a little curious about the whole alcohol thing. What does it feel like? So apparently being drunk is actually just your body being poisoned by excessive alcohol (thank you B.Dub, who I'm pretty sure will not read my blog), but it must be a decently pleasant poisoning bc it seems to be popular. Is it like the feeling you get when you get a new puppy for your birthday (not that I know what that is like either).

So anyway, in case you're curious, I'll try to explain why I don't drink. Part of it is religious, though not exactly how you might expect. I don't think drinking is wrong in and of itself (though I do think doing so excessively is). However, part of the church covenant at my home church in SC is that we will abstain from alcoholic drinks as a beverage (I have had communion wine-elsewhere, as they don't use real wine at my church-which is not for beverage purposes and therefore doesn't count), and I figured that since I agreed to it when I joined the church, I'll abide by it. Although I was only like 12 when I did so, and I'm not entirely sure I actually agreed to it (I think I might have skipped saying that part when we had to recite it, but I don't remember-it was a while ago), so I may re-explore the issue at some point.

My non-religious reason is that I feel like I might be one of those persons who doesn't hold his alcohol well and/or may not be good at drinking in moderation. Of course I don't really have a way of judging either of those things, but it's just kind of a hunch I have. And I like having control of myself; thus being under the influence is less appealing. Not that drinking necessarily means getting drunk, but it helps right? And since I have enough of a challenge not being an idiot sober, I'm wary of throwing alcohol in the mix. :)

Also, I hear alcohol actually doesn't taste that good, and I like things that taste good. Maybe (if I drank) I could drink one of those fruit flavored drinks with the umbrellas and the pretty colors-those look good.