Shared attraction

I've long thought that it would be convenient if people had signs that displayed if they liked someone, though i realize that could be complicated bc then you'd have to worry about whether or not they liked you back and all that. Now I'm thinking maybe some kind of electronic advice that like had the name or names of who you liked and would start beeping or something (perhaps vibrating in order to keep it more confidential) when you're around one of those people if that person also had your name in their device. Then it would get louder (or, um shakier) as you got closer to the person. Would still cause some problems (like if the members of a love triangle were in the same room) but it would help take out some of the guesswork.

I think they have websites like that, where you put in people's name and if each put in the other's name they both get emails. And I imagine facebook either has or will come up with an application to do that. Still, having it in real life would be cool.

Oh and don't read anything into the topic of this post...i like to muse about these type of things, so i dont have anyone in particular in mind as i'm typing, though i imagine the situation will come up again at some point in the future.

Dog-fighting, Hip Hop, Black People

I didnt have any intention of jumping on the Michael Vick commentary bandwagon until today, when I read an article posted on CNN by actress Emily Deschanel, who plays the lead on the Fox show "Bones." Most of the article is respectable, talking about how this case has brought attention to a problem of animal cruelty that is more pervasive than we might think. But in the middle she had a couple of paragraphs that bothered me (and several of the commenters on CNN):

"Unfortunately, legions of today's youths are being sold the lie that fighting dogs is a way to prove their bravery and machismo. This twisted mind-set is marketed by certain forces of popular culture, from high-rolling rap artists who boast about their pit bulls' prowess to millionaire sports stars like Vick.

As a result, the scourge of street dogfighting has infiltrated virtually every urban area across the country. Gang members and street thugs seek street cred by showing they have the baddest dogs on the block."

First of all, I always like it when "urban" is used as a code for "black." Second, even though my sparse and anecdotal knowledge of dog-fighting may involve black individuals (Michael Vick, some people back home in SC and...well that's about it), I doubt its a particularly African-American phenomenon. For one thing, despite the article decrying it as an urban problem, my pre-Vick knowledge of it came from living in the rural south, where I would think that white individuals would be likely to engage in such activities as well. Note that Vick is a southerner as well, growing up in VA. Furthermore, a quick glance at wikipedia's "dog fighting" entry shows that it is practiced all over the world, including Russia, India and Japan, which I doubt are taking their cues from African America or Hip hop.

Which leads me to my last annoyed point-how did dogfighting suddenly become a consequence of hip hop? Now of course you can find references to dogfighting in rap songs if you look hard enough, but it's not really something that's prevalent by any means. The fact that it's there at all just reflects that such fights happen in the real world. Are there rappers who own vicious dogs? Sure-they can be a macho status symbol as the CNN article said, and/or used for (over)protection of one's property. And I wouldnt be surprised if some rap artists had engaged in dogfighting. But to say that hip hop promotes dogfighting is a stretch. The only artist I can think of that might fall guilty of that is DMX, and even in his case he uses the image of a vicious dog in large part as a metaphor for his own personality and upbringing rather than in a "hey i fight dogs, aren't I impressive" sense (though he is no stranger to animal abuse allegations, so i wouldnt be surprised if he had been involved in a fight or two in his life). Now I'm not trying to be an apologist for rap music-certain strains of it do promote or glorify a lot of negative things. Dog fighting though-I just dont see it.

Taller Women?

I've been wondering how women feel about dating shorter guys. I've always just assumed that they didnt go for that, but I've seen/heard of enough couples with taller women to rethink that. Plus, given my modest height of 5' 6" (i think), sticking to equal or shorter does narrow the dating pool a bit, if pools can be narrowed.

Oh, and I hope none of my taller female friends start to panic, this wasnt inspired by any one person in particular-more of a general musing, as i tend to do.

TV-less

So i've entered Day 3 of not having a television. I've still managed to keep my sanity, but it ain't pretty. No Sunday morning talk shows to tell me which politicians think they will make the best presidents, no judge shows to explain to me why i can't lock out a roommate without giving him proper notice (triple damages ya'll!), no reality shows to show me what happens when people stop being polite and start being real! If only they would put shows on the internet. Wait, they do? Sweet!

As always, comments are welcome on any of my posts, even the inane ones.

Haircut

It's gone, all gone! "It"=my hair, aand "all"=99%
My head looks a lot smaller now. And a little egglike. You're right, an omlette would be good now.

"Graduation" (the album) is comin!

I havent been feeling this year musically, but Im actually kind of excited about this new Kanye West album. Sure he's a bit immature at times and has no shortage of ego (a trait that stands out for him even among big-name rap acts, which says something), but darn if he doesnt make good music. "Stronger" is a cool song, and i really like "Can't Tell Me Nothing"...especially, and this is a small part, Young Jeezy's ad-libbed "Haha" in the background of the chorus. And seriously, anyone who puts a teddy bear on all of his album covers has to be kind of cool, no? Who's a good dropout bear? You're a good dropout bear! Yes you are, yes you...ahem. So yeah, Graduation. Might be a pretty good album.

Solitude

One roommate moved out, the other is on his way out of the country, leaving me in this big apartment. Where is a helper monkey when you need one?

Crank Dat

For any one who hasnt heard of the "Crank Dat Soulja Boy," here is the dance (to what I think is a slowed down, or screwed, version of the song). you may have to copy the address and paste it to a browser:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GEgioIoKySE&eurl=http%3A%2F%2Fblogs%2Esohh%2Ecom%2Fdirty%2F2007%2F07%2Fgangstas%5Fdont%5Fdance%2Ehtml

and here are a bunch of knockoffs and parodies (Crank Dat Soulja Boy being the original):
http://www.xxlmag.com/online/?p=12509

Be warned that these may contain some not nice language (which I'm not endorsing of course).

"Summer, Summer, Summertime"

Arg, it's almost September! How in the world did my summer fly by so quickly. I did get a couple of things done (a little research, some planning for a black Christian conference in the fall, attending a couple of weddings), but not nearly as much as i wanted to. I've been wondering a bit how cut out I am for this whole grad school thing. I mean i can be pretty productive in spurts, which tend to coincide w/ being within 24 hours of a deadline, but when my backs not against the wall, I'm easily distracted or willing to put it off to later.

Things I didnt get accomplished: learning French, brushing up on math, reading through economic development reading list, more research, writing a paper (though hopefully that will happen), getting a haircut, conquering small nation and ruling with benevolent yet iron fist, and going to the gym.

Feel free to comment

Test Post

Hey all. Since I havent blogged in a long time, i figured i'd see if anyone was still interested in reading this thing. If you think you would be interested in me blogging again, please leave me a message in the comments (long or short, named or anonymous) to let me know that someone is still reading this thing. I'll see what (if any) response i get, and proceed from there.

So i have another ambiguous I dont intend for it to be a date and don't think she thinks it is but i'm not quite sure thing coming up tomorrow.

And if you've been wondering why i haven't been blogging, which i don't think you were, i blame it on (laziness and) an insanely busy workload. at least i have my girlfriend. oh wait, she's not...nevermind :)

ok so i know i haven't been keeping up with this recently. School and whatnot has been keeping me really busy (have 800 or more pages of material to read each week plus other things to do). So school is what's occupying most of my time. It's also getting cold, which is expected but not welcomed :)

Also today or yesterday i had a mini revelation that when I pray/worship i kind of take a tone of tallking at God (i.e. treating Him as if He were far away and i was sending a message off to Him) instead of talking to Him (as if He were right there, which of course He is). Just wanted to share that

First day of school! (well first day for me, as i don't have any Monday classes-score!).

And one of my most favoritest people in the world should be back in town today :)

So hears a rundown/update on my life:

Got to see my brothers before i left MD. That was really cool. The oldest seems to have picked up a talent for picking up women that i did not inherit, as evidenced by his interactions with the waitress at the restaurant we were at. Not that I would be picking up random people left and right if i had the ability, but it is still interesting to see.

I'm gonna be an uncle! (courtesy of the other brother).

New apartment is nice. My room is messy, partially bc its small and i haven't figured out where to put everything yet (and mainly bc i m messy), but the rest of the place is sweet. and i get cheap rent for having the small room.

My new roommate is unbelievably handy, which i may have mentioned before. And he doesn't even think its a big deal that he's building all these really cool things for the place.

Lost one Weld 12 freshman year roommate to Columbia (though he visited last weekend and will again today, so i may end up seeing him as much as i did when he was in town :)) and another to Philly, but regained a third, the cool KK (no jokes please), who i'm living with again as he starts the History program.

Most of my friends from grad school seem to be back in town, though my closest friend from the program is not coming up until next week (miss you, in case you're reading) and i havent yet seen another though she and I (Ms. J.L.) are suppose to get together today.

So yeah thats most of the new stuff in my life. not too shabby (as a fellow grad student told me once, "sufficiently shabby")

ok so not quite as advanced on either the paper or my comparative politics class as i wanted to be, but oh well. still doable.

Yay! friends are back in town! (well not all of them yet, but several). Happiness. So makes up for the fact that my foot has been hurting for over a week (and all i did was a little extra walking in DC-what gives, i wonder)

The class of '04 rocks! (as does their significant others-not leaving you out C.I. You probably don't read my blog anyway though, but J might). Went out w/ some old roommates (actual and honorary) on Saturday night, and some HRCF/Soulfood folk last night. Good times were had all around.

Gettiing the apartment in order AND getting inspiration (thank God-no really, I am giving Him credit for any breakthroughs coming my way) for my paper. Not too shabby start to this new school year.

so i think i've done more today than ive done in a single day in a long time (and its not even 4pm yet). took the redeye train from dc to boston, signed my lease, got my stuff moved in, got stung in the big toe by a wasp (or yellowjacket or some such creature-not particularly fun, with the stinging then the aching then the PAIN and the hurting and the why why, glavin).


(imaginary gold star to anyone who recognized that impression).

Back in Cambridge! (or maybe Somerville. either way, in the area).

Getting hurricane rains. perhaps this will keep me in and let me continue actually working on my paper.

Haven't gotten any comments on the blog recently :(

Finally got around to talking (over IM) to a few people I hadn't talked to in a long time (a college friend and some folks from Kamp). Catching up rocks!

Also, a friend from college is gonna be back in Boston again this fall, which is pretty cool-I'd like to catch up with her, and I feel like we didn't hang out as much as we should have in college.

Plus I get to potentially get in touch with the girl I met in Detroit (no, its nothing more than just a friendly thing. yes, i did manage to actually meet someone in a social setting). Other than the school part itself (which hopefully will be interesting too, despite my disillusionment with political science of a few months ago), going back to school might just be fun.

Wow! i've worked for like 2 days in a row. this paper might be written this year. sweet.

we'll see.

Hmm, i'm starting to miss folks. My friend who was in DC for the summer (who i only went to see once :( ) is leaving after this week, and i don't know many other folks here (i've only seen my younger older brother once and havent seen my dad or oldest brother at all this summer). Granted this is largely bc of my laziness, and that usually i'm fine w just sitting around by myself, esp if i have net access, but sometimes even i like contact. I also havent been talking online as much with the people i usually talk to (though did have one long late night IM convo the other night that was good, like the old days). Have reconnected w/ one old friend after a long time which has been really cool. Looking forward for when folks are back in Cambridge and hopefully can catch up and stuff.

Hmm, i'm starting to miss folks. My friend who was in DC for the summer (who i only went to see once :( ) is leaving after this week, and i don't know many other folks here (i've only seen my younger older brother once and havent seen my dad or oldest brother at all this summer). Granted this is largely bc of my laziness, and that usually i'm fine w just sitting around by myself, esp if i have net access, but sometimes even i like contact. I also havent been talking online as much with the people i usually talk to (though did have one long late night IM convo the other night that was good, like the old days). Have reconnected w/ one old friend after a long time which has been really cool. Looking forward for when folks are back in Cambridge and hopefully can catch up and stuff.

Hmm, i'm starting to miss folks. My friend who was in DC for the summer (who i only went to see once :( ) is leaving after this week, and i don't know many other folks here (i've only seen my younger older brother once and havent seen my dad or oldest brother at all this summer). Granted this is largely bc of my laziness, and that usually i'm fine w just sitting around by myself, esp if i have net access, but sometimes even i like contact. I also havent been talking online as much with the people i usually talk to (though did have one long late night IM convo the other night that was good, like the old days). Have reconnected w/ one old friend after a long time which has been really cool. Looking forward for when folks are back in Cambridge and hopefully can catch up and stuff.

How is it possible to have so little motivation :)?

for some reason, going to bed late and waking up (relatively) early makes you tired. who woulda thought?

So this new Macbook of mine isn't half bad. And its nice and portable, as a laptop should be. Cool. (I still fancy PCs though, but will give credit where credit is due).

Sometimes it feels wrong how quickly things go back to normal after something bad happens.

So is it weird for a guy (me, for example) to be more comfortable with a female doctor than with a man? Not that I was uncomfortable today (part 2 of my checkup-in good health apparently), but just relatively a bit more comfortable with a woman.

Also, dont you just love getting a physical and then stopping at McDonald's for lunch :)

Went to the Library of Congress today. They couldn't find what I was looking for, but were nice, and directed me toward where the items might be.

Its hard to think of someone you knew and who was the same age as you as being gone.

Found out this morning that a cool person, who i only got to know briefly, died this past weekend. May she be with God.

I didn't make the sexy list in In Style magazine :(
I checked both C and R and I'm not to be found.

Alicia Keys did however (under "Music Maker"), so its forgiven :)

It works! It works! (my new modem arrived today, and now i have both regular and wireless internet). Plus itunes works now!

!

Went to the doctor and the dentist today. I should be so healthy now! Also got some good news from my brother.

not too bad, not too bad

"And if it's real,well I don't want to know"

So somehow calling Verizon tech support (a few times) in order to get my wireless working resulted in me having no internet access at all until sometime this week. :(

Yay! i got my new computer!!

So I've finally done it. I've crossed over. I bought...a...Mac! They come with a little camera built in (i played w/ jon's sister's mac at their house for a few minutes) and you can do neat things with your picture. and I hear that they're reliable and all that stuff too. Happy Happy joy joy.

so, the other night i actually managed to interact, in a social setting, with girls i had just met. may even meet up with one of them in Boston. note that this is just in a friendly sense, not romantically, but still...

is it wrong to use a dog as a rug? I didn't actually do this, mind you, but i was tempted with jon's dog-he's so fluffy. but i figured that the dog might not appreciate it.

Went out w/ jon to meet up w/ a couple of people he knows in Detroit at like this pool hall type place. It was actually pretty fun. I'm not usually that into the going out and socializing w/ random people, but there were a couple who actually were really cool and we had good conversations (and i did not actually play pool). I also got a free soda :)

YAY! I reconnected with a friend of mine from middle school who i've talked to once in the last 10 or so years. So very excited to be able to talk to her again.

Still in Michigan w/ Jon (he gave me permission to use his name). Very nice house. We've played frisbee (land and water), seen Superman and Lady in the Water (weird movie) and done other fun stuff. More details later.

In Michigan baby! Flying is cool-like i looked down and saw a football field that looked this big (note: "this" refers to roughly the size of a small coin of some kind). My friend has a very nice house (and spacious, like seriously) in one of those "one of the richest places in the US" places. And...AND, i played frisbee. in a lake. a wet lake.

Going to Detroit tomorrow! Visiting my old roommate for a few days.

so i've not shaved in a week and a half or so. first i had the cool stubble thing going, then it went into an awkward more than stubble but not quite beard thing, but now its in cool (dare i say sexy?) actual beardness. oh yeah

"that's ok cause so are you"

Yay! I thought I lost my cell phone yesterday, which would have been a bit of a hassle, but it was discovered safe, sound. Now I can go back to not actually calling most of the #s i have saved in it. But i have the option to call now, which is important :)

"Wanna be my lady in the water?" If a gentleman asked a woman this, would it be:
a. good
b. bad
c. creepy
d. other (please specify)

Advice for all you out there-if you start dancing to "My Cherie Amour" in the supermarket, someone may walk by and see you. Just a tip.

Any suggestions for things to do in DC over a weekend?

Today may be one of those not leaving the apartment days. Me and the world wide web to keep me company.

The tapwater tastes a bit strange today. I suspect a communist plot to contaminate our precious bodily fluids.

(lest anyone think i'm weird, or at least weirder than i really am, i hope you get the movie reference)

Saw the original episode of Miami Vice Saturday night on NBC. It was great!
SPOILER ALERT: If you haven't seen it, stop reading here, as I'm about to list some highlights.


Crockett (Don Johnson)'s partner, played by Jimmy Smits, perishing in an explosion from a rigged car during a drug deal. And unlike those shows that just cut from the actor to the explosion to imply the person is being killed, they actually showed, for a split second, the guy (or more likely a dummy dressed like him) fly out of frame from the force of the explosion.

Crockett punching his new partner Tubbs after Tubbs saying something out of line to him, then Tubbs, after accepting Crockett's apology, suddendly punching Crockett in return-good old male bonding.

Tubbs starting to go downstairs for ice on Crockett's houseboat after the punchfest to be greated by Crockett's pet Alligator!

Tubbs indignant racial attitude. See: "I know we all look alike to you"

Random breakdancers/ pop-lockers on the streets

The obligatory meeting bad guy in the strip club scene.

Tubbs and Crockett taking out several bad guys (who have automatic weapons) in a shootout without even having to duck behind anything.

Crockett and Tubbs meeting after Crockett, in his sportscar, chasing the guy who ends up being Tubbs who is driving a SPEEDBOAT (yes, the car on land is chasing the speedboat in the water). At one point, Crockett's car is flipped on its two left wheels then falls back onto all fours, all without even slowing down. Also Tubbs thinks he's escaped by hiding under a bridge, but of course when he starts to pull out from under it Crockett jumps down and lands behind him and punches Tubbs as he turns around.

the 80s. that's what they were like.

First time I heard a sermon that started by talking about Fear Factor.

Also had dinner w/ J-dawg and her boyfriend (as well as her sister and the boyfriend's friends). Twas good-we made calzones, chatted, all that.

Ah dreams. Had one this morning that involved me being in a class taught by Cornell West and being put in a group of other black guys (probably inspired by seeing the wedding party yesterday) for an assignment. Then I go into Harvard Square (I think) with a friend (I think) where I run into a girl that I used to have a crush on. She does that playful thing where she comes up behind me and puts her hands over my eyes and says something to me. I, having seen her reflection a few seconds before, am like "Hey ___" and she's like 'how did you know who it was?' I do confess to having caught a glimpse of her. I think we kinda flirted a bit more in the dream (remembe that this is more than I have done in real life with her or anyone else for that matter, and I'm pretty sure this particular girl in real life has no idea i used to like her). I then return to class and realize I've forgotten to do the assignment. I consider skipping out on the class (it was established at some point that we got two absent days during the semester) for fear of being called on during lecture.

So basically this dream combined my chronic unrequited crush-ing angst and my recurring fear of being caught unprepared in school (which has inspired many many dreams for some reason).

The streak continues. The Electric Slide has now been played at 103,247,322 black weddings :)

Seriously though, went to a wedding this morning. It was fun. Some highlights (in the sense of amusing me):

The pastor saying that one of the keys to a happy marriage was to keep passion in your bedroom. Then repeating it many times, emphasizing "your."

The best man putting the garter on the woman who caught the bouquet and her leg hiking very high up suddenly (I thought he was the one to do the hiking but my mom insists she did it herself).

The older guy with the big afro leading dances when most people were too shy to get up and move.

The bride's very enthusiastic response of "yes, I will!" to the vows (even more stark in contrast to the groom, who was obviously happy but spoke in a low voice that most of us couldn't hear).

The best man (if i heard right) saying " 'gratulations" to the groom during a toast.

The ringbearer (the grooms 9 yr old son) walking down the aisle with both flowergirls when the wedding party came back for the reception.

Cut my hair for the first time in almost a year. I've been meaning to do it for a while, and figured it'd be nice to be clean for the wedding i'm going to tomorrow. My head looks so small now though. On the bright side, should i choose to wear a hat at some point, i can.

So does the fact that my nose occasionally bleeds for no apparent reason make me a bit nerdy? Or am i that for other, non-nose reasons?

I seem to have little motivation to write this paper of mine.

So Israel has, according to reports, killed almost 200 civilians in Lebanon. I do understand that they need to secure their country and that if people were launching rockets into DC or Boston that were randomly falling in the city and sometimes killing people, we'd want to stop that and rightly so. But at what cost?

A military analyst for CBS said that, because Israel uses military force to recover its captured soldiers whereas the US only searches for them w/o using force, Israel places a greater value on "human life" than we do. Um, I somehow don't see killing a highly disproportionate number of citizens (and mainly civilians at that) in other countries to rescue a few represents a greater value placed on human life. It is placing a greater value on ISRAELI life, and by implication a lesser value on the lives of others.

There was also an ambassador from Israel who said that the difference between Israel and the groups like Hezbollah were that everytime Israel kills a civilian in one of their countries, its an accident and a great tragedy, whereas when they kill an Israeli citizen, its a victory. While I agree that the second half of statement is true of groups like Hezbollah and that that makes them morally worse in an important way, I think the first half of that statement vastly overstates the Israeli government's moral high ground. I don't think they purposely kill civilians, but when they do so accidentally its not because of a tragic mistake despite their utmost efforts to avoid so. They take calculated risks of hitting civilians to achive their goals, and it doesn't look like they are too hesitant to launch missiles or bombs that will, not only possibly, but probably kill civilians (sometimes if fairly large numbers as in Lebanon). They aren't trying to target civilians, but i doubt they are very broken up when they do, as long as they get their target.

Back in Maryland. Apartment hunting went well, but then didn't. After seeing 8 apartments in one day, we narrowed it down to 2. But just before leaving to go back to DC (yay 8 hour train rides!-no, really, they're fun when you have a lot of CDs) one of the other roommates had to pull out, so we had to start over. Some new places for us have been found, so its not a total loss by any means, but did put some wrinkles in our plans. Alas, such stuff happens.

Lots of apartments to look at tomorrow. Wish me well.

Also lots of girls dressing down around Cambridge due to the heat. Must avert eyes :)

Made it back to Boston. Good old 10 hour train rides (it usually takes 8 hours from DC, but this one was scheduled to go longer for some reason). At least it got here on time, as the train rarely does. Didn't get as much sleep as i wanted as the guy behind was doing the loudest (and kinda gross sounding) snoring i've ever heard in person. Also I think there was a girl on the train I know from Harvard, but I don't really know her that well and wasn't sure it was her, so i kinda walked by her and waited to see if she showed any signs of recognizing me. She didn't, but I hope she didn't think i was being rude (well maybe i was). Mainly i was just being awkward, as i tend to do.

So I'm currently praying for Gaza and Israel and Lebanon. At first I was somewhat sympathetic of Israel going to great lengths to recover their kidnapped soldier, even if other factors were at play. I've thought before about if i were president or head of some organization like the UN (yes, i have modest, realistic goals for life), I'd like to be able to guarantee the safety of my citizens all over the world, especially if they were doing something important, like UN relief work (on top of the horrors inflicted on the local people of places like Darfur, it also really saddens me when relief workers trying to help the situation are targeted as well, and i see agencies either just accept it or pull out, as I guess they don't have other viable options). I may have gotten the idea from a West Wing episode where, fairly early in the President's administration, there's a terrorist attact that kills American citizens and he is angry and wants to have some kind of big, as opposed to measured or proportional, response, evoking the protection of citizens of ancient Rome anywhere in the world.

But all that aside, this current Israeli response seems to be spiralling out of control. At first they were causing massive damage (and probably inflicting hardships on a lot of people, blowing up bridges and power stations and whatnot), but at least it seemed that people weren't dying. But now dozens of people have died, including those in the recent clashes in Lebanon, including civilians. Now I'm not really a utilitarian or anything like that, but causing the deaths of dozens of people in order to save one (now three, counting the two soldiers captured by Hezbollah) is pretty ridiculous in my opinion. Just to be clear, I'm also not one to blame Israel for everything-I'm actually pretty sympathetic to them a lot of the time, and in these conflicts I think that those who target civilians intentionally are worse than those who do not (though i think that discounting civilians as collateral damage is not that much better morally). I think the militants linked to Hamas and Hezbollah have a big part of the blame here, but i also hold Israel, as a state and one that portrays itself as the victim, to a higher standard (as I do the US in its war on terror, war in Iraq, etc). This means that I think they should show a LOT more respect for life, especially civilian life, even if their enemies might not and it may lessen the advantage that the Israel (or the US) has over their enemies. And when i talk about respect for life and especially for civilian life, I mean all of them, not just the ones that are Israeli (or US) citizens.

Pray.

getting ready to head up to cambridge this weekend to look at apartments. so apparently if you wait to book plan tickets a couple of days before your trip, they get expensive. who knew?

Going to a wedding in 2 weeks. My mom's friend's son is getting married to someone, so i'm going w/ mi madre. Finally gives me a chance to wear my suit. Though i probably won't be meeting any women (the thought of me and my mom scoping potential dates Wedding Crashers style is a little disconcerting). Or is it? Yes, yes it is.

i don't remember ever seeing a headbutt to the chest before.

Renewed desire to get to know God better

Yes! Internet is back! Now to mindlessly surf...

Yay! Power!

So power was restored around 4pm yesterday, right after i left for my second library trip to charge my phone, and a mere 47 hours after the initial failure. Apparently a neighbor went down to the work crew and talked to the manager. He claimed not to know that our power was still out (the rest of the area had it restored the morning after it went out but our neighborhood had not). This is despite the fact that the power company had a recording set up telling us when they expected our power to be restored (with the deadline shifting each time my mom called them). Assuming said power company has not made incredible advances in artificial intelligence (sorry, i've had that snide comment in my mind since yesterday), someone at the company did realize we were out of lights. Second, it seems that the reason we were out was that some guys had knocked some things loose during a previous repair job, so that the storm on the 4th finished dislodging whatever parts they had jarred. Oh well, its back on now so i'm happy.

Of course, we've since had problems with the phone lines, meaning my internet isn't working and i'm am back at the library yet again :)

So still without power at my house (in the library at the moment). The 11:30 am deadline for having the lights back on seems to have not held. Oh well, there have been a few benefits. Besides listening to a lot of music (Alanis Morrisette has a few issues), I've had romantic candlelight dinners the last two nights. Granted they were alone (unless you count my mom in the other room, though I don't think that adds to the romance :)), but still, not something i usually do. Alas. It is interesting to just have some quiet time though and reflect or whatnot, so it hasn't been a total loss. Still, electricity and hot water would be nice.

So yesterday (the 4th) around 5pm we had a storm and our power went out. We're estimated to get it back by 11:30am tomorrow (the 6th). In the meantime, it's been giving me a chance to catch up on my CDs. Listened to two Run DMC albums that i had bought a while back (really entertaining even though its about 20 years later), the first EPMD album (with a lot of samples and beats that have been reused in later songs by people like Jay-Z and Nas among others), a live Michael W. Smith album (a Christian artists whose CD i picked up a long time ago and initially didn't like that much but have grown to really enjoy, especially as some of the songs are used by Harvard Radcliffe Christian Fellowship and thus have a deeper meaning for me now that i've sung them w/ others) and a Live (the band) album, though i did fall asleep listening to that one (not bc it was boring but just bc it was late at night and dark). Currently at the library. Wish me luck :)

Went out w/ CB and her boyfriend today (they;re in town for her friend's wedding). We had vegetarian indian food. it was good, as was seeing them. I found out there was written music for drums, dashing my hopes of becoming a drummer. Sadness (not really though).

So with the Fourth coming up, i was thinking about this whole flag burning amendment thing, which failed to pass by one vote in the Senate. Now I understand that people feel strongly about it, but i really don't see how so many people, especially legislators, don't see making such an amendment as a big infringement on free speech. Granted a lot of them were probably supporting it just for political gain and not true conviction, but still the fact that it came so close to passing Congress is kinda scary. And even the argument that burning the flag is action and not speech (i think i heard Diane Feinstein make that argument to explain her support for the amendment this morning), why should someone not be allowed to burn a piece of their own property if they like. Now, I don't think its generally a good idea to insult people that way. I personally find other things more offensive, like burning crosses (not just because I'm black but also because I'm Christian), but i think there's a big difference btwn something being offensive and it being worthy of outlawing. And really, even moreso that the stuff congress often considers, arent there more important things to be done. Alas.

So i felt kind of bad-my friend (lets call him "G"), had this important meeting earlier this week in Boston (concerning money for youth jobs, which is really important for them for keeping kids out of trouble and danger over the summer), but i didn't call him to see how it went. and when i saw him online just now, i was about to IM him but he called me before i got a chance. Not that he seemed upset or anything about me not calling, but i did want to do so this time before he called me. Darn my lack of effective concern. hey, there he is now on the phone.

"We know something about corruption in Massachusetts"
"We do it well, we produce something"-from a discussion on Inside Washington on PBS, comparing corruption related to Katrina and New Orleans to corruption in the Big Dig in Boston.

yay! my friend CB from grad school is coming to town this weekend. Sure she's coming for her friend's wedding (which i'm not invited to just because i don't know the couple or any of the people other than CB herself :)), but hopefully i'll get to see her before she leaves. Yeah, that probably would involve getting out of the house. We'll see how that one works.

Reading Economics for Dummies. If I still don't get it after this book, I may have to rethink a few career plans...

Ok, first of all, I do hope the kidnapped Israeli soldier is and remains ok. Second, am I completely off-base for thinking this Israeli incursion is a bit of overkill. Now i know that i dont know a lot about the Israeli/Palestinian situation at the moment, and i realize that a lot more than the soldier was considered when authorizing this show of force, but its hard to keep sympathy for Israel when they take such moves, especially as they often seem to take the view that loss of civilian life is acceptable (though i don't know how much that applies to the current operation, but it wouldn't be surprising if civilians are or will be killed in this operation). Again, I dont know too much about the situation, so if anyone who does has comments, please let me know. I like to be educated.

So am i suppose to care about the Star Jones/View breakup and potential feud that is brewing? Somehow I do.

Also, there seems to be some sunshine outside, which is so ruining my excuse for being reclusive. I guess I could always say i was "working on my paper." Yeah, i might stick with that one.

so it looks like it will basically rain all week in the DC area. Which will likely hurt my already shaky chances of leaving the apartment. oh well. perhaps it will help me write this paper i'm supposed to be working on. Hey, anyone know anything about agricultural policies and interest groups in Zambia or other southern African countries? (specifically concerning genetically modified foods). Anyone? Come on, people :)

The billionaires are so upstaging me. First, Bill Gates and all, now Warren Buffet is giving away most of his fortune (mainly to Bill Gates' foundation, particularly). Now i need to make a few billion and then give it away. Anybody want to contribute a few (million) dollars?

Yep, i did in fact make it out twice yesterday. The World Refugee Day thing at National Geographic was good. Makes me feel like I should do something-suggestions are welcomed

This could be a landmark day-i may leave the apartment TWICE. I'll let you know how it turns out.

Also, scholarly articles that include a reprint of a Doonesbury strip are cool.

So it's supposed to storm for about the next 2 days, which may put a bit of a cramp on my plans to get out this weekend. Not that that was ultra-likely to begin with. Alas.

At least I have Barbara Walters and the View (wait, that doesn't come on on the weekends. :( )


Perhaps I'll start working out this weekend, as I am kinda out of shape lately.
Note: "kinda" means extremely, "lately" means all my life.

So Ghana just beat the US 2-1 and eliminated the American team from the World Cup. I have mixed feelings. On one had i was kinda going for the US (in large part because I'd like for soccer to catch on here), but on the other I'm a fan of Africa and Ghana looks like the team with the best shot of doing something in the Cup. On the one foot, the US didn't play very well, so it doesn't feel wrong that they lost, except that on the other foot the winning goal was on a penalty kick for what in replay did not look like a foul. on the (hmm, out of appendages) head, though, even without the goal, the score would have been 1-1, and i don't think a tie would have helped the US, but on the , um, some other body part you can use in soccer, who knows how the game would have gone had that goal not happened. Alas, maybe next time-go Ghana!

So is it unacceptable for me (being a guy and all) to prefer watching "The Tuesday Night Book Club" over the third quarter of potentially the last game of the NBA finals? Just wondering.

Also, I really like PBS' Frontline shows. They actually help me understand stuff a lot better, and teach me things I didn't know. This week's was on Dick Cheney, specifically his moves and influence post-9/11. It was amusingly entitled "The Dark Side" (though this was a reference to a comment he made a few days after the attacks about how the new war would be fought). Perhaps not a neutral news piece, but as usual very well done.

So my dreams often have a stream of consciousness, the end has nothing to do with the beginning kind of thing, but this mornings was a bit much. My dream (or maybe dreams as i'm not sure if it was one or more than one) included superman, the last week of college, a girl i worked with at summer camp, sketchy parties, Stargate SG-1, dodgeballs, a girl from grad school (all in that order i believe) and many other things i can't probably remember now. and then when i woke up and looked at my phone, i thought it was highlighting the number of the girl from camp in my dream (i eventually realized that i don't have that girl's number in my phone, and the one highlighted was actually ANOTHER girl i worked with at camp whith the same (though differently spelled) first name. Weird.

Hmm, perhaps i should go out of the house today. I did get out a couple of times this weekend (to the store and Church), but that mainly involved walking to and from the car. After the loooooong MA winter, I should enjoy some of the MD heat.

Should also start my research paper at some point :)

So is it bad that i find myself rooting for the majority black teams in the World Cup. Granted most of them are from Africa, a continent i like to root for in other contexts (or from Trinidad and Tobago, the smallest country represented). Thus there is an underdog factor as well. Nonetheless, if it was an underdog nonblack team, i'm not sure i'd be as excited. Hmm...

(I'm also torn about rooting for Ghana or the US in their upcoming faceoff, since i think at this point at most one of those two can advance).

Saturday morning cartoons just arent' what they used to be. Among other things, they have new versions of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and Batman, but they seem to lack the depth of story and writing that the older ones (especially Batman) had in their heydays. Instead they substitute more action and flashiness, but i feel us 24 year old viewers are a little shortchanged. Oh well, good thing i don't usually get up this early on Saturdays.

Bill Gates is making me a fan. It looks like he's serious about this whole helping out the world thing (in case you didnt hear, he announced that he'll take more of a backseat at Microsoft to work more on his and his wife's Foundation stuff). Just imagine how many lives he could (and probably has already) save and/or improve. Bill and Melinda and Bono and Jeff Sachs are getting major brownie points with me (which is of course why they're doing it all :)) Regardless of the criticisms put their way (like Bono being self-righteous or annoying or Sachs not producing legitimate scholarship) their hearts and heads seem in the right place, and they seem to be doing major concrete good. That rocks.

So I've been trying to get into the World Cup, watching it on the local spanish language channel (the various ways of yelling "Gol!" after a point is scored is indeed entertaining). I can't say that I've been converted to a soccer fan, though it can be enjoyable if one of the teams interests me (the US for obvious reasons, Brazil because they have so much expectation behind them, various former colonies and small countries because of the underdog factor, etc). Off of that last point, its kind of cool to think of the larger geopolitical implications (yeah, I'm a bit of a political science nerd aren't I) of the matches. Iran playing a game in Nuremburg seemed a bit ironic given all of the stuff with Israel lately. Angola playing its former colonizer Portugal, etc. I also enjoy trying to figure out which team is which when i miss the beginning of games (looking at names if i catch a close-up, trying to guess from the composition of the team, etc. And the Spanish advertisements that unexpectedly include American names (*talking in Spanish* "McDonald's! *more Spanish*); that's fun.

So it was recommended that i look at some online dating sites, which i did, mainly for run. I think most of them are not for me, thogh i did find an interesting one for Christian folk which was interesting, and there appeared to be some interesting people.

I'm still a bit skeptical about the enterprise though. I guess I'm just a bit distrustful of the prospect of trying to start anything with people that i don't really know and who could be misrepresenting themselves (though i'm not sure why they would, but still its a possibility). I think my ideal relationship is still to develop something with someone i've known for a while and consider a good friend (both because i'd be confident that i really know the person and because a large part of what i consider to be an ideal relationship is to have someone who was a really good friend, with the romantic stuff added on).

So i kind of doubt that anything more than browsing will come f rom the websites, but we'll see.

So as a lot of you already know, I was into a certain young lady for a good period of the last school year. I thought we might be a good match. She was quirky (arguably more so than me, which is almost scary).And more importantly, she is an incredibly strong Christian, which was really attractive. Actually that was also one of the things that made me kind of nervous, as i didn't want to be a bad influence.
So i attempted to hang out and get to know her and eventually to indicate my feelings (kinda) but it just didn't work out. I don't know if she just wasn't interested but tried to let me down easy (as best she could) or if she just didn't realize I was interested (i tried to indicate it as strongly as I ever do, but that is still kind of subtle i guess). Either way it didn't work out. I feared I was becoming a bit bitter for a while (it felt like my intentions were being ignored, which may be worse than being rejected-I haven't decided yet), but I'm pretty much over it now i think. I'll give her the benefit of the doubt, and she is still a great person (which is why i liked her in the first place). Oh well, whatever God intends, he'll bring about.

So i kind of developed some disillusionment with political science over the last year, especially the last semester. Besides my own so so performance with the discipline, a few things have come into question in my mind. One, taking two semesters of statistics has, more than anything else perhaps, left me skeptical of any attempts to use statistics to make a point or prove something. Sure lots of people (myself in the future included probably) use it sloppily, but even the best stuff out there often seems sensitive to assumptions used, specific measurements, etc. I'm just not convinced that it really reveals much.

I also took two formal modeling/game theory courses. While I actually liked game theory, I sometimes wonder about its contributions to a lot of the works where it is used. It is nice to formalize logic and identify assumptions, etc, explicitly, but at the same time it really just seems like taking what you have elsewhere said in words (or what you should have said in words but didn't) and saying it in math instead. This may make the logic clearer for some, especially the mathematically inclined, but i'm not sure it really adds that much to a lot of papers. Plus, I feel like people use it to "prove" things, which i don't think is necessarily legitimate, as the results you get seem totally dependent on the assumptions you put in. I mean as long as this is acknowledged that's fine, and useful insights can still be drawn (for instance by showing that certain results follow from a range of plausible specifications of a model), but I feel like people are often not upfront about the limitations, whether intentionally or not.

In general, I think that political science thinks of itself a lot like economics, trying to find rules that generally explain behavior/actions. In economics though, there are often a lot of actors such that even if some deviate, they balance out and do behave in predictable ways. I feel like in political science however, there are often too few actors for this to be valid, especially if the unit of analysis is country. Then a few actors (controlled in many instances by a few people) have much power to change results, and it is hard to model processes that depend on the whims or choices of a few people (often in complicated or uncertain situations). There may be some topics of political science (voting behavior perhaps) where these arguments/techniques are valid, but for comparative government/international relations i fear they're not.

All this being said, my game theory and stats professors were obviously very very brilliant people, as were other profs i have had. Concerning the former two sets, I assume that if they are so smart they must also see a greater importance/usefulness to their disciplines, so i am somewhat willing to take them at their word, so to speak. With a lot of the people who do more substantive stuff, however, I feel that often the thing that impresses me about them is not their use of quantitative or formal methods (even when they themselves believe in them and employ them often) but just their knowlege of history, organizations, political actors, etc. I sometimes wonder if i should just focus on learning a lot of particulars about the places/topics i want to study instead of focusing so much on the techniques, but i know i'm expected to know the techniques, and they may actually be useful down the road (plus they are paying me, even if rather modestly, to learn them, so i should probably give it a shot). Perhaps some time off and/or independent study (though i don't know how long I will keep up the latter) will give me a new (hopefully more positive?) perspective-we shall see.

So we had to move out of our apartment by June 1st. It was fun being there. Should have cleaned more (sorry about that). Also should have spent more time with the folk. Might have been my last time to live with J and 'gito :( so i should have taken more atvantage of that. Plus i didn't get to know the other roommates as well as I would have liked. We had some good times though (surprisingly many while watching "Grey's Anatomy" which seemed to bring us all together). Some close friends who weren't roommates (most notably JB, who of course was my roommate for four years) also will be gone-sadness. Get to live with Kubes next year though, which will be cool. And some of the folk will still be around, so all is not lost.

So as mentioned yesterday, I've finished up my first year of grad school. Academically, it was kind of, meh. I think my grades will be ok (though perhaps i shouldnt speak too soon) due in large part to some kind game theory professors (most awesome academic couple ever!). Still need to do that research paper for my International Political Economy (IPE) class. In general though, i realized that i really need to improve my study habits. The procrastination and all-nighters/last minute cramming don't work nearly as well in grad school as they did in undergrad. Especially second semester, I found myself not completing assignments or being woefully unprepared for an exam. Oh well. I also became somewhat disillusionsed with several aspects of political science as a discipline, but I can get into those later. I'm trying to get ahead with some stuff this summer in hopes that it will help me come school in the fall.

So one year of grad school is down and...well, it wasn't bad. I really liked my classmates; as usual the people were the best part of school for me. The GGGs (the Gorgeous Girls of Government, as i named them) were really cool, though we didnt all hang out as a group that much as the year went on. Maybe I will try to get us all together in the fall, though that would take effort and me organizing things, both of which rarely happen. JDawg is in DC this summer, so i'm glad I'll have her to hang out with here. I may visit/stay with CBear in Cambridge at some point (i have some loose ends to take care of there at some point). And (hmm, havent thought of a nickname for this person yet that she would find acceptable-you know who you are :)) and I will likely IM until the wee hours of the morning like we usually do (she's been an amazing friend by the way-who would have thought that I would find someone who was both so much like me and an attractive girl-go figure). So yeah, friends, cool.

next time...my first year of grad school: academics (not quite as cool, but oh well)